Sarah hamilton's Blog

This is where you'll find my musings on Gratitude, Inspiration, Stillness and Awe…. "Transform your thoughts, transform your life"

A Win-Win April 6, 2010

Filed under: Uncategorized — sarahhamiltoncoaching @ 9:04 AM

Where did the expression, “Dog eat dog world” come from or “Eye for and eye” or for that fact “There ain’t no such thing as a free lunch”.  Yes, it is all about someone winning and another loosing and a hard world but what I am wondering is what would happen if we shift our thinking to more of an everybody wins?….

How can we enter every interaction as a win-win?  Most people enter situations asking themselves what’s in it for me?… But what would happen if we were to shift this thinking into What’s in it for us?  How can we both win?  Whether it be work, home, friendship or nearly every facet of our lives?  Who says that someone has to lose and someone has to win? I was once told that the way you do anything is the way you do everything…. Think about it.  The best example is a simple board game.  Did you enter thinking win-win?

Thought for today.



6 Responses to “A Win-Win”

  1. Dennis Marynak Says:

    I feel even without giving it conscious thought that most interaction are naturally win-win. The only time it becomes a lose-lose situation is when a person cheats, lies or uses some other questionable means (such as taking advantage of someone in a vulnerable position) to obtain the object of their desire. When they use those means to “win” they lose because they have broken the bond of trust.

    • You might be quite surprised that the win-win state of mind is rather a high conscious way of thinking and that most people enter situations without even realizing it thinking “What’s in it for me”. The the win-win is a very rare and healthy or anabolic way of thinking and a lose-lose is a very catabolic or unhealthy way of thinking. Now if there is a purpose to be found in everything thing which infers free will who’s to say that by losing the loser in fact did not win? The question is How can I make this a win-win for both of us?…. Then the next step above that is the implicit understand that no matter how it turns out it will always be a win-win because of Universal Law and that is a whole other conversation 🙂 Hope that helps!

  2. Dennis Marynak Says:

    I’m not trying to be difficult but I’m still having trouble understanding how abuse or other evils can be seen as win-win. For example: A psychopath could care less about another person. All that matters to them is they get what they want. The pain or suffering they cause another is of no concern to them. Now the person upon which the evil was inflicted may be of such a spirit as to forgive that person and in that sense of the word is truly the winner; but the psychopath doesn’t care about your forgiveness and probably would just laugh at it as a sign of weakness. What I’m trying to understand is how does one take such a dire circumstance and change ii into a win-win situation for both? Even if the person forgives the psychopath the bond of trust has been broken.

    • You are not being difficult at all. And now that I am clearer about the type of win-win you are referring to I hope I can be clearer for you as well. The relationships I was talking about are your daily ones that you consciously Chose and know and want to be involved with. A person at this level of thought would never consciously enter into a business or loving relationship at any point with a psychopathic person because there is no win-win with them. There is no rational thought with a psychopath. The point is this would not could not happen at this level of thinking.

      So. the question that I go back to though……. is How would you enter your relationships to make them a win for you and a win for them?

  3. Dennis Marynak Says:

    “The relationships I was talking about are your daily ones that you consciously Chose and know and want to be involved with.So. the question that I go back to though……. is How would you enter your relationships to make them a win for you and a win for them?”
    To me the beginning point is respect. Not just for the person you want to have a relationship with but for all people, all creature and all of the creation. This kind of respect is not a selective choice of I’ll respect this person or creation but not this
    person or creation. There is no not respecting only respecting. But that is only the starting point.

    • One chooses how they respond to Everything in their life. How you respond to other is your Karma and how they respond to you is theirs. So if for you the beginning is respect you walk in respectful shoes. And that is a wonderful place to be! To respect others no matter where their belief system lies and without judgment is beautiful. As a life coach I ask questions to raise ones energy levels and I mean consciousness energy. Living in a win-win is a higher energy level and not always easy to reach. But one one tries to reach it. Unconditional love or absolute passion is our truest most pure point. But I will save that for another post. 😀

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