Sarah hamilton's Blog

This is where you'll find my musings on Gratitude, Inspiration, Stillness and Awe…. "Transform your thoughts, transform your life"

What To Do When All Your Efforts Seem To Fail… June 27, 2012

Now that I think about it, it depends on how you view failure…. I believe that there isn’t such a thing as failure.  I don’t want to place the judgement on the “thing” that happened as good or bad it’s simply an event in life that gives me a choice as to want I want to do.  Life is merely one moment after another of opportunities to make a choice as to where you want to go from here.

 

We all know the age-old adage, ” When one door closes another door opens.”.  I for one am not actually a fan of that adage.  Throw the windows open!  I think that are always windows and doors open to my house so I can yet again choose.  This expression some how connotes that the door has been shut on us as opposed to being the ones doing the shutting… a bad followed by a good… Why can’t we be the ones to place the weight on how we view our existence…. I’m the one shutting the door.   I know I’m probably getting rather esoteric about my door shutting analogy but think about it, we have choice over how we view what is happening.  If “failure” isn’t an option because there isn’t something we call failure,  just simply steps towards our future… wouldn’t that make a more  joyful life?  I believe that how we respond to everything in life is a choice.  We may not have control over our subconscious thought but we do over our conscious thought.  We have the choice to either suffer or not.  That said what emotions and responses are you choosing that you may want to take on another path…?  As opposed to seeing what we haven’t down look at what you have achieved?  As opposed to seeing the glass half empty, see that there is still water in it at all? I love to find the beauty in the situation so that the harder things are not so hard at all.  And after a while you may not see anything as hard it simply is what it is without any judgement.

 

So go throw your windows open and air it all out!!

 

Energetically with love,

~Sarah

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Moving Out of NYC June 14, 2012

In my mind I am a native New Yorker.  I have lived in New York City for 25 years.  I pretty much went to college here and stayed because I love it.  There was a brief sojourn to London for a couple of years but back to NYC I came.  New York was still my home.  I have lived longer here than anywhere else in my life.  That said after what’s been a long and wonderful time where NYC has protected me, made me grow and challenged me I have made the decision to move.  Move?!! you say? Yes.  I am moving up to Connecticut where my my boyfriend and family live.  I want to be closer to him and take the next step on our journey together.

Ok.  Now what’s really going on.  I realize that I at this moment in time I must walk the talk of who I am.  I also want to be straight up about my feelings which are… scared, excited, terrified, exillerated and overwhelmed (hence the exhaustion that has set in).  All that goes into moving a rich life from one state to another is A Lot!  I have moved my life before but I haven’t closed everything (bank accounts, gym memberships, utilities) down and departed. Just finding a bank is rough enough alone because of the timing of electronic bills.  I’m sad that I am leaving my beautiful garden apartment behind.  The usual question I get is, “You’re sub-letting right?” No I am letting it go!  Yes go. Also, I have been spending a ton of time with my boyfriend but when I am living close by what could happen then? (ah oh there’s that fear again!)  When I look at the fear and anxiety that comes up I know that to shift out of it one must explore the feelings, fill in the lines so to speak so that we can shift out of it.  Though while there, it isn’t always that comfortable. Meditation and the breath have been my closest companions.  And boy have I been talking it out… to myself.  If the neighbors could hear me they might be a  bit concerned.  I mean even keeping my mind straight versus it’s tangental thinking has been a chore in and of itself.  I am the list maker…. Oh by the way does anyone want a free piano?  They just need to be willing to move it out of a difficult space? No wait get back to the point!

But then I shift and think about the possibility in what I’m moving to, not away from.  Love!  What is better then that? The ultimate growth is in allowing yourself to be loved and to love in return. And if I can move away from the fear and closer to love then the lesson has been totally worth while.  I know that sounds like a cliche but as the Dalai Lama says, “My religion is kindness”  and the only thing better is love, as he would say.  Or as Don Miguel Ruiz would say.“You don’t need to justify your love, you don’t need to explain your love, you just need to practice your love. Practice creates the master.” There truly isn’t anything else in this world that is important other then love. So I sit with my uncomfortableness and fear so that I may move closer to the love that I know I have.  The greatest reminder is to be as gentle as I can with myself.

Speaking of gentle I must remember I will be close to the train so I can come back in tot the city whenever I want or need to. I’m not going far even though it may feel as such.  And importantly all of my friends I will know will remain part of  my life no matter where I live and I will be apart of theirs.  This is the next step in my growth.  We all have different phases in our lives where we can either allow the growth or stifle it.  I believe growth is a bit like molding clay and we are the clay.  We are being pushed and pulled and squished into something new but in the end we arrive at a piece of art.  I for one am all for the molding of the clay so that we become a beautiful new sculpture.

Where do you allow for the the discomfort to let yourself grow?  What kind of sculpture would you want to be? Me, I’d like to be the Venus de Milo… with arms that is.

 

Energetically,

~Sarah

 

More Brene Brown June 11, 2012

Filed under: Uncategorized — sarahhamiltoncoaching @ 11:40 AM
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I have posted about Brene Brown before and she’s remarkable!  I invite you to take a few minutes and watch her Ted Talk.  She states that we find our strength through or vulnerability and shame because when we can can express it we are the most present and creative.  Just watch and you’ll see and Love!!

 

 

 

The language we use June 7, 2012

I regularly post on Facebook and Twitter about language. My strongest coaching tool is helping my clients become aware of their self talk.   As we all know language has power and how we talk to ourselves can make or break our self-esteem.  That said, here is a list of words to become aware of in your speech.

Should:  The best thing to say about this one is, “Don’t should on yourself” When the word is used there usually is obligation places on the act on which you feel the need to follow through. Now here is a tough one… Only do the things that you want to do.  For example “I should go to work.”  Sure work is not necessarily great everyday but we want to make money to pay our bills.  Hence you want to make money so you go to work.  We get something out of everything that we do so I invite you to look at your motives and find the want in what you’re doing.  Then once you can find your want versus your should you are able to remove the obligation and guilt that comes along with the should.

Need: Listen to how often you use the word need…  When we need something we do not approach it with the same energetic strength that we would had we approached it with a want.  Again with the want 😉 We follow through with our goals when they are a want versus a need. Our obstacles block us when obligation strikes us. Look again…

But: ” I wanted to go swimming today but it was rainy and I thought twice about it.”  When you use the word but in a sentence you negate what is initially said.  So by looking at the sentence you really did not want to go swimming because it rained and you changed your mind.  In a sentence like this the but is really quite innocuous.  Though when used in a sentence like. “I thought your show was fantastic but in the second act…..” So you really didn’t think the show was fantastic. I simply invite you to look at what and how you are speaking to yourself and others.  Do you want your anabolic phrases to land on their own merit or would you rather land on the down note.

Can and Can’t: These 2 words are simple.  You are saying I choose to and I don’t choose to.  Now sometimes we are physically unable to do things and if we were able to choose we would. Like say for instance fly on our own accord. That said if you are, let’s say invited to a party it is completely ok to say you are unable to go due to a prior engagement but (and yes I just used the word but on purpose) if you can’t? No.  You are choosing to go to your prior engagement. Everything you do in life is a choice.  Be empowered with your thinking and choose how you respond.  Be the cause of your life not at the effect of it.

Again back to the shoulds, needs, can’ts and buts…. How do you want to approach life? Empowered and anabolic? To quote one of my favorite children’s poets Shel Silverstein:

 

“Listen to the mustn’ts, child. Listen to the don’ts.

Listen to the shouldn’ts, the impossibles, the won’ts.

Listen to the never haves, then listen close to me…

Anything can happen, child. Anything can be.” 

 

Listen to how you think….

Energetically,

~Sarah

 

 
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